Let's Have a War
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Examinations suck. They constrain my freedom to do something that is healthy like eating the right stuff, reading manga, and of course, playing.
I still have to face the final set of exams tomorrow. Gotta go to my notes now.
Goodbye!
I still have to face the final set of exams tomorrow. Gotta go to my notes now.
Goodbye!
Posted by thecurse at 22:28
 Image breaker ♥
Fell in Love with the Game
Monday, January 14, 2008
Can't write something for tonight. I still have to review for our preliminary exams in Sociology and Philippine Literatures tomorrow. I'll definitely come up with something tomorrow, or so I thought.
Goodbye!
P.S.
Tiring....
Goodbye!
P.S.
Tiring....
Posted by thecurse at 23:08
 Image breaker ♥
Dead Eyes See No Future
Sunday, January 13, 2008
I admit it. I became a slave of other people and allowed them to pull my strings. I drifted away from my aspirations and forced myself helplessly to fight for other's cause. In the end, it feels like I was strained like some kind of steed that was used to travel a thousand li and then left in the middle of nowhere.
I allowed people to dictate me who should I be. But deep inside, the idea of I who I wanted to be is fading. I cannot even blur the line that's dividing the two, because those two entities are extremely different.
But now, things are changing. I'm taking hold of my own destiny even if it means me against the world. Well, it may appear as a one man war against this vast world but if it is the only way, then why not. Time to break the white walls and cut the fingers of the puppeteer that is writing "my" future.
What if you're life is in ruins right now? Can you still reverse it, or will you allow yourself to be surrounded by the debris of your crumbling life for good? Of course, you have to gather yourself from the dirt and start from scratch. Yes, It's not too late for me to hammer my armor and polish my own boots.
I must reverse my life, I can't live in the past.
Well, I don't want to end up like the subject proper in Alexisonfire's Boiled Frogs. I don't want to grow old regretting the simpliest misfortune of my past.
I'll be the captain of this ship and the lord of my world. I won't allow anyone to ruin me, again. Nevermore will I be controlled by the puppeteers who just wanted to bring me to rubbles. I'll take hold of my own destiny and carve my future.
This is now. How can I change tomorrow if I can't change today? This is now. If I control myself, I control my destiny.
By the way, reading Death Note manga is different from watching it. It's more addictive and it's more suspense-filled than the animated one. I guess, I'll just stick to it.
Goodbye!
P.S.
My account for WidgetBucks has been verified. I'll be placing it on my blog. Please check it out. I'll be changing the products every three days. So better keep an eye on it. Thank you.
I allowed people to dictate me who should I be. But deep inside, the idea of I who I wanted to be is fading. I cannot even blur the line that's dividing the two, because those two entities are extremely different.
But now, things are changing. I'm taking hold of my own destiny even if it means me against the world. Well, it may appear as a one man war against this vast world but if it is the only way, then why not. Time to break the white walls and cut the fingers of the puppeteer that is writing "my" future.
What if you're life is in ruins right now? Can you still reverse it, or will you allow yourself to be surrounded by the debris of your crumbling life for good? Of course, you have to gather yourself from the dirt and start from scratch. Yes, It's not too late for me to hammer my armor and polish my own boots.
I must reverse my life, I can't live in the past.
Well, I don't want to end up like the subject proper in Alexisonfire's Boiled Frogs. I don't want to grow old regretting the simpliest misfortune of my past.
I'll be the captain of this ship and the lord of my world. I won't allow anyone to ruin me, again. Nevermore will I be controlled by the puppeteers who just wanted to bring me to rubbles. I'll take hold of my own destiny and carve my future.
This is now. How can I change tomorrow if I can't change today? This is now. If I control myself, I control my destiny.
By the way, reading Death Note manga is different from watching it. It's more addictive and it's more suspense-filled than the animated one. I guess, I'll just stick to it.
Goodbye!
P.S.
My account for WidgetBucks has been verified. I'll be placing it on my blog. Please check it out. I'll be changing the products every three days. So better keep an eye on it. Thank you.
Posted by thecurse at 17:50
 Image breaker ♥
My Demon
Friday, January 11, 2008
I've seen its sign, even on the skies. A thin strip of cloud resembling the letter 'Y' is visible at the western sky this afternoon.
We're always assuming something good even if the real side of this world is ugly.
Later, since I'm too tired.
Vale!
P.S.
From this day, I'll be changing my style. Metamorphosis is important when you're at the crucial phase of your life.
We're always assuming something good even if the real side of this world is ugly.
Later, since I'm too tired.
Vale!
P.S.
From this day, I'll be changing my style. Metamorphosis is important when you're at the crucial phase of your life.
Posted by thecurse at 18:41
 Image breaker ♥
Fever Dog
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Damn! What on earth is wrong with me? Yesterday, I suffered from upset tummy without even eating something, fever that turned out later to be flu, headaches, a bad case of LBM but was anticipated, and strange cases of dreams. Well, since 2008 entered, it feels like my systems are deteriorating at a very slow rate. It started with very grave sleeping habits, series of headaches, and then, this one. I don't know, but this feels like the movies.
Well, I'll go to my bed and try to sleep. I still have preliminary examinations in our Theology class. At least, it's not a subject that is as difficult as Economics in terms of absorbing it, eh?
Vale!
Well, I'll go to my bed and try to sleep. I still have preliminary examinations in our Theology class. At least, it's not a subject that is as difficult as Economics in terms of absorbing it, eh?
Vale!
Posted by thecurse at 21:14
 Image breaker ♥
I Lay Sleepless on my Grave
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Hey! What the hell is wrong with me? It's just 10:03 and I feel so sleepy. Crap! I used to be someone who is very energetic when the Sun abandoned the sky. But, what on earth is wrong with me?! Oh well, I guess, I just have to give in since there are no classes tomorrow and I'll just review for our preliminary exams in Economics.
I'll just write something tomorrow morning.
Vale...
I'll just write something tomorrow morning.
Vale...
Posted by thecurse at 20:53
 Image breaker ♥
Come Clarity
Monday, January 07, 2008
Hey there! Well, I'll just post something brief because I'm off to review for our exams in Logic, and it is killing my arse.
I'll just give you a piece of some action when I was bored, hope you'll like it.
Well, I'll be going now, since reading my logic book isn't a joke.
Vale!
We sinned and we lied,
Yet we stood on summer rain,
I laughed as I died,
Since my feelings are in vain.
Do you hum the same song?
Or my ears are treacherous?
Yet for you, I long,
And touched the dangerous.
Should I fight for redemption?
Or aren't you worth saving?
Since he's for your salvation,
And I'm here, suffering.
Alas, I truly belong to twilight,
And I came from my shadow.
For I cannot afford the price to fight,
Since death, no, you will not hallow....
You, you reek of death...LOL
P.S.
You're a wish I never had. It will take a lifetime to understand why I don't deserve the chance to prove I worship your every move...
I'll just give you a piece of some action when I was bored, hope you'll like it.
Well, I'll be going now, since reading my logic book isn't a joke.
Vale!
We sinned and we lied,
Yet we stood on summer rain,
I laughed as I died,
Since my feelings are in vain.
Do you hum the same song?
Or my ears are treacherous?
Yet for you, I long,
And touched the dangerous.
Should I fight for redemption?
Or aren't you worth saving?
Since he's for your salvation,
And I'm here, suffering.
Alas, I truly belong to twilight,
And I came from my shadow.
For I cannot afford the price to fight,
Since death, no, you will not hallow....
You, you reek of death...LOL
P.S.
You're a wish I never had. It will take a lifetime to understand why I don't deserve the chance to prove I worship your every move...
Posted by thecurse at 18:54
 Image breaker ♥
Square Nothing
Sunday, January 06, 2008
Hey there! I just tried my luck on a Rubik's cube. Well, I sucked! The pattern doesn't concern me because it removes the thrill. But like what I've said, I'm done and done. I'll just head to my pillow and forget the whole ordeal. If I were you, I'd rather not try it because it will just blow your head and arse off, unless you're trying to become someone.
Vale!
P.S.
I'm feeling nauseous and I think I'm going to throw up. But I'm fighting for redeption and begging for forgiveness.
Vale!
P.S.
I'm feeling nauseous and I think I'm going to throw up. But I'm fighting for redeption and begging for forgiveness.
Posted by thecurse at 22:07
 1 Broken image ♥
The Unnamed Feeling
Sunday, January 06, 2008
He [I] said, who truly belongs here? Not I...
Hi there! Well, what constitutes the human soul when you're trying to struggle from the deepest part of the problem? I know that you will answer things such as reason, trust, faith, virtues, etc. But when you're at the core of the problem, can you still rely on these words?
Can we really describe pain with words?
What if pain is just an illusion created by man to hinder himself from being true? What if misery is only meant to be a solo mission? What if everything is just a goddamn LIE?! Well, I never wished for something like time lapse to turn the tides back from the ocean but I'm starting to lose faith on myself, and to hope, as well.
This afternoon, when I realized that everything is just a masquerade and I'm the figuerhead, scapegoat, puppet and the doll, I couldn't help myself but lose its focus and wander about different things without such apparent reason at all. It's similar on being a paranoid; thinking about things that are insignificant.
Well, here I go again, wasting myself and my ideas on such worthless things. But how can you classify if an entity is worthless or not? It goes in my way: When something doesn't touch me, it's worthless. But this case is different.
Will I always lose this game?
For others, this may be a joke or some kind of drama to laugh about; a laughingstock or a jerk, if I must say. But everything here has a purpose, even pain.
What if I'll just scream out that these are nothing but mere 'unholy confessions' and I pulled the strings like what the other party did? It won't work. Because in the end, the loser is still me, even if I'll try to wage a war against the Olympians.
In semiotics, the color coding of hot and cold outlets of water is meaningless because the source of water is just the same. But when you'll simply look at their problem, how the hell would you suppose to know that the faucet is for hot or cold water? Do you still have to try? I don't think it's meaningless at all, similar to what I'm feeling right now.
In matter, physical change is only possible when there is a catalyst of change. As I've seen in .hack//Roots awhile ago, Haseo changed his attitude when Shino was PK'ed and fell into comatose. In fundamental rules, nothing in this world is permanent except for change. Well, isn't it the good time to "change" myself? Starting from the inside?
Time for me to drum myself up from my ruins for my private war!
From now on, I'll cut the string that binds me with my past and destroy the saints I used to worship (figurative speech).
BTW, I just finished .hack//Roots and it is really a very good Japanimation. If you're a gamer and you really love to play games, better see this and relive those glorious gaming moments.
Well, I still have to fix myself because tomorrow might be a sunny day.
Who would keep from lashing out? Anxiety chokes me like razor wire.
I'll keep this feeling by myself, and in this blog, of course. Aside from my real brothers, this artificial place is a friend that I can really rely on. I know that he will never betray me.
Of course, feelings are contagious. It is similar to the poem Diameter of a Bomb by Yehuda Amichai. Sorrow is a very powerful emotion. When you're in agony and you wanted to keep it by yourself, you'll just end up as a loser. Why? Sorrow is just like death. It travels in full circle and it does not only affect you but the ones around you, as well. Sorrow cannot be "black-boxed" or kept inside Pandora's chest.
Gotta go now, and think about the ideas for Children of the Grave Part II. It's better to think when you're solo.
Vale!
P.S.
I'm half-dead, wearing thin, wearing out, wearing off and slowly falling apart. Will you help me? Kidding! I can solve this by my own.
P.P.S.
The reason why I named this entry as such because I don't know what to feel, either. Don't be confused.
Hi there! Well, what constitutes the human soul when you're trying to struggle from the deepest part of the problem? I know that you will answer things such as reason, trust, faith, virtues, etc. But when you're at the core of the problem, can you still rely on these words?
Can we really describe pain with words?
What if pain is just an illusion created by man to hinder himself from being true? What if misery is only meant to be a solo mission? What if everything is just a goddamn LIE?! Well, I never wished for something like time lapse to turn the tides back from the ocean but I'm starting to lose faith on myself, and to hope, as well.
This afternoon, when I realized that everything is just a masquerade and I'm the figuerhead, scapegoat, puppet and the doll, I couldn't help myself but lose its focus and wander about different things without such apparent reason at all. It's similar on being a paranoid; thinking about things that are insignificant.
Well, here I go again, wasting myself and my ideas on such worthless things. But how can you classify if an entity is worthless or not? It goes in my way: When something doesn't touch me, it's worthless. But this case is different.
Will I always lose this game?
For others, this may be a joke or some kind of drama to laugh about; a laughingstock or a jerk, if I must say. But everything here has a purpose, even pain.
What if I'll just scream out that these are nothing but mere 'unholy confessions' and I pulled the strings like what the other party did? It won't work. Because in the end, the loser is still me, even if I'll try to wage a war against the Olympians.
In semiotics, the color coding of hot and cold outlets of water is meaningless because the source of water is just the same. But when you'll simply look at their problem, how the hell would you suppose to know that the faucet is for hot or cold water? Do you still have to try? I don't think it's meaningless at all, similar to what I'm feeling right now.
In matter, physical change is only possible when there is a catalyst of change. As I've seen in .hack//Roots awhile ago, Haseo changed his attitude when Shino was PK'ed and fell into comatose. In fundamental rules, nothing in this world is permanent except for change. Well, isn't it the good time to "change" myself? Starting from the inside?
Time for me to drum myself up from my ruins for my private war!
From now on, I'll cut the string that binds me with my past and destroy the saints I used to worship (figurative speech).
BTW, I just finished .hack//Roots and it is really a very good Japanimation. If you're a gamer and you really love to play games, better see this and relive those glorious gaming moments.
Well, I still have to fix myself because tomorrow might be a sunny day.
Who would keep from lashing out? Anxiety chokes me like razor wire.
I'll keep this feeling by myself, and in this blog, of course. Aside from my real brothers, this artificial place is a friend that I can really rely on. I know that he will never betray me.
Of course, feelings are contagious. It is similar to the poem Diameter of a Bomb by Yehuda Amichai. Sorrow is a very powerful emotion. When you're in agony and you wanted to keep it by yourself, you'll just end up as a loser. Why? Sorrow is just like death. It travels in full circle and it does not only affect you but the ones around you, as well. Sorrow cannot be "black-boxed" or kept inside Pandora's chest.
Gotta go now, and think about the ideas for Children of the Grave Part II. It's better to think when you're solo.
Vale!
P.S.
I'm half-dead, wearing thin, wearing out, wearing off and slowly falling apart. Will you help me? Kidding! I can solve this by my own.
P.P.S.
The reason why I named this entry as such because I don't know what to feel, either. Don't be confused.
Posted by thecurse at 18:39
 Image breaker ♥
Children of the Grave Part I
Sunday, January 06, 2008
Hey there! I just realized something when I woke up. I am ashamed that I'm a part of this generation. Say, what is the name of this generation of freakingly annoying youth? Are they (of course, I wanna exclude myself from them) the Friendster/Myspace generation? Internet generation? Primitive generation? Gunshot Wound generation (since most of them belong to the subculture of emo)? Nursing generation (most of my batchmates are nursing students as of now [not only my batchmates but from this generation, as well])? Crap! I'm so ashamed. At least I wanted to be a baby boomer or something like a guy from Generation X.
I was walking on the school yesterday when I thought of this topic as a good discourse since it has been bothering me for weeks; write something and something and something about it. But during those days that I wanted to write, my sleazy mind started to malfunction. Well, at least, I am now fully motivated to write about it, eh?
First, one thing that is very notable about this generation is the emo. Apparently emo started, flourished and dominated this generation not like any other subculture that became available for them to patronize. Did I say 'subculture'? YES. Emo isn't exclusive to a genre of music nowadays but became a movement wherein (do I have to describe them) kids listening to such stuff are becoming retrogressive.
What's with emo? To admit something shamefully, there is one point in my life that I listened heavily to such stuff, but was never bothered by it. Emo, according to them is fun (is is really?) since you're "in" when you're emo. What kind of in?
The culture of emo is kinda crappy, since they're somehow hopeless romantics, misanthropics, pathetics, fanatics and frantics, as well. They're always saying that they wanna die but they cannot even allow their bread knives to touch their skin. Are they really motivated to die? Well, the answer is no.
Aside from suicide, emos are also notable because of their hedonistic culture, i.e. the revival of the "sex drugs and rock 'n' roll" motto. Some of the emos that I personally know are fond of using cannabis as for the reason that they wanted to seek shelter through high times. Valium, heroin, MDMA, etc. are also included. Some of them are even heavy drinkers and alcoholics. The question is why such culture. I don't know but I'm ashamed. And I really hate on how people suffering from messianic complex correlate emo with Straight Edge despite the fact that emos do not even know what sXe is. Crap.
Aside from being the emo generation, our generation is also noticable because of the rise of coffee shops like Starbucks, Gloria Jean's, The Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf, etc. We all know that coffee is good, and bad when excessive. But these guys from this generation enjoy coffee as if it is a necessity in their lives.
Imagine yourself sitting in one of the pop coffee shop chains in Manila. At a typical scene, a person (most of the time a female but hey, I'm not a sexist or something like a biased faggot okay?) enters the scene at her best Sunday dress, orders a grand latte, waits for several minutes, sits beside the window as if she's a mannequin from a clothing shop, gets her coffee, sips for about an hour or two, gets a handful of tissue as souvenirs, and leaves.
It's funny how coffee shops became a fad not only to the guys on the upper hand but as well as to middle class heroes. I'm still wondering on why people like 'em spend big bucks for a cup of coffee topped with shaving cream and dove crap. There's no logical reason at all!
Of course, I've been there several times (since some of my friends wanted to talk to me on coffee shops) there and tried some of their products. All I can say is my mom can offer me a better cup of hot chocolate. I really don't get it, even if I tried immersing with the craze.
Okay, let's put it this way: The coffee is reasonably priced. Still, as a person living in a "developing" country, we should not spend that much for just a cup of coffee. It's kinda troubling when you could see the glitteratis sip golden coffee while some of our brothers cannot even have a decent meal for at least three times a day.
To conclude this issue about coffee, all I can say is that they're visiting such shops because someone (I don't know who that someone is) is dictating that sipping coffee like that is similar to wearing the latest clothes in Paris. Well, to that someone (or perhaps something, like the media, for example) who started this coffee craze in the Philippines, the latest album of Radioactive Sago Project are my words:
TANGINA MO ANG DAMI DAMING NAGUGUTOM SA MUNDO FASHIONISTA KA PA RIN!
(well, I'd rather not translate it)
Well, at least, I'd rather not discuss them all in one piece because it will become too boring since it's too long.
And oh, I'm bohemian.
I'll just draft the second part ASAP. I wanted to finish this topic. LOL
Vale
P.S.
"I didn't care that you left and abandoned me, what hurts more is I would still die for you...."
P.P.S.
Life isn't a video game. It doesn't promise a good ending.
I was walking on the school yesterday when I thought of this topic as a good discourse since it has been bothering me for weeks; write something and something and something about it. But during those days that I wanted to write, my sleazy mind started to malfunction. Well, at least, I am now fully motivated to write about it, eh?
First, one thing that is very notable about this generation is the emo. Apparently emo started, flourished and dominated this generation not like any other subculture that became available for them to patronize. Did I say 'subculture'? YES. Emo isn't exclusive to a genre of music nowadays but became a movement wherein (do I have to describe them) kids listening to such stuff are becoming retrogressive.
What's with emo? To admit something shamefully, there is one point in my life that I listened heavily to such stuff, but was never bothered by it. Emo, according to them is fun (is is really?) since you're "in" when you're emo. What kind of in?
The culture of emo is kinda crappy, since they're somehow hopeless romantics, misanthropics, pathetics, fanatics and frantics, as well. They're always saying that they wanna die but they cannot even allow their bread knives to touch their skin. Are they really motivated to die? Well, the answer is no.
Aside from suicide, emos are also notable because of their hedonistic culture, i.e. the revival of the "sex drugs and rock 'n' roll" motto. Some of the emos that I personally know are fond of using cannabis as for the reason that they wanted to seek shelter through high times. Valium, heroin, MDMA, etc. are also included. Some of them are even heavy drinkers and alcoholics. The question is why such culture. I don't know but I'm ashamed. And I really hate on how people suffering from messianic complex correlate emo with Straight Edge despite the fact that emos do not even know what sXe is. Crap.
Aside from being the emo generation, our generation is also noticable because of the rise of coffee shops like Starbucks, Gloria Jean's, The Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf, etc. We all know that coffee is good, and bad when excessive. But these guys from this generation enjoy coffee as if it is a necessity in their lives.
Imagine yourself sitting in one of the pop coffee shop chains in Manila. At a typical scene, a person (most of the time a female but hey, I'm not a sexist or something like a biased faggot okay?) enters the scene at her best Sunday dress, orders a grand latte, waits for several minutes, sits beside the window as if she's a mannequin from a clothing shop, gets her coffee, sips for about an hour or two, gets a handful of tissue as souvenirs, and leaves.
It's funny how coffee shops became a fad not only to the guys on the upper hand but as well as to middle class heroes. I'm still wondering on why people like 'em spend big bucks for a cup of coffee topped with shaving cream and dove crap. There's no logical reason at all!
Of course, I've been there several times (since some of my friends wanted to talk to me on coffee shops) there and tried some of their products. All I can say is my mom can offer me a better cup of hot chocolate. I really don't get it, even if I tried immersing with the craze.
Okay, let's put it this way: The coffee is reasonably priced. Still, as a person living in a "developing" country, we should not spend that much for just a cup of coffee. It's kinda troubling when you could see the glitteratis sip golden coffee while some of our brothers cannot even have a decent meal for at least three times a day.
To conclude this issue about coffee, all I can say is that they're visiting such shops because someone (I don't know who that someone is) is dictating that sipping coffee like that is similar to wearing the latest clothes in Paris. Well, to that someone (or perhaps something, like the media, for example) who started this coffee craze in the Philippines, the latest album of Radioactive Sago Project are my words:
TANGINA MO ANG DAMI DAMING NAGUGUTOM SA MUNDO FASHIONISTA KA PA RIN!
(well, I'd rather not translate it)
Well, at least, I'd rather not discuss them all in one piece because it will become too boring since it's too long.
And oh, I'm bohemian.
I'll just draft the second part ASAP. I wanted to finish this topic. LOL
Vale
P.S.
"I didn't care that you left and abandoned me, what hurts more is I would still die for you...."
P.P.S.
Life isn't a video game. It doesn't promise a good ending.
Posted by thecurse at 02:49
 Image breaker ♥
Don't buy Vista Security
| Previous Page | Next Page |