I have a former classmate, as well as a brother (since I call my true friends as brothers, because they are my family), a confidant, an advisor, a drummer, a partner-in-crime, a master, a band-mate (a drummer), a rival, and of course, a damn good friend. Actually, there's nothing special about him aside from his drumming skills, except for one thing.

It was Valentine's Day yesterday, and as usual, it felt like nothing; nothing at all. But, it's already a normal case for me. Well, when I was aboard the train, I was thinking about what love really is about. You see, it is represented by different signs like flowers and razorwires, poems, chocolates, etc. but none of them really fitted my idea of what love is.

I watched those lovers fondled inside the train; giving romantic looks, exchanging sweet nothings, holding hands as if they're bonded with superglue, and standing back to back with love played in super slow motion. I just observed them and learned what their manifestation of love is.

When I alighted the train, a very romantic scene filled me with awe. I saw two elders, probably a married couple, assiting each other as they went down the stairs on the overpass. After all those years, perhaps, they have learned what true love is all about.

I watched how the city lights played with the hideous and overcast night as I rode the vehicle. They gently envelope the thin and smoggy air with radiance that makes the night more hideous yet calmer. I went at the back of my mind and tried to redeem myself from this unnamed feeling.

After I came home, I dropped on the couch and thought that there is no place better than home. Mom said that I looked like a broke businessman because I was leaning there too much. And then, I looked somewhere else to divert my attention into something else. What caught my attention was a rotogravure portrait of a couple on their wedding gown and coat. And the couple on the picture are my parents. But I remembered something that placed a frown on my face: I am a child of a broken family. Actually, I do feel neither sympathy nor apathy for my parents, because I think they did a wise decision. Because it is better for a sniper to be without his spotter than waking up in the morning and after opening your eyes, you will see the greatest mistake you've done in your life.

Because I was feeling so wasted, I went inside my room and lay on my bed. That time, there was something on my mind but I could not pinpoint what exactly it is. So I tossed and turned but that was not Tainted Love. It felt like a word was at the tip of my tongue but I could not see it.

Because of the mixture of an unknown feeling, frustration, wasted-ness, and other strange sensations inside, I just decided to go to the computer (my artificial friend) and do something. Suddenly, my friend (as well as my brother), Kenjiro, called me and asked about how did my V-Day go. I remembered something, something that came up abruptly and without warning. At last, the memories returned, and slowly, a sinister grin came from my face. So, it was all about my friend who was described on the first paragraph.

Actually, that something special about my friend is his relationship with her girlfriend that lasted for four years, and their anniversary is bound to be today, their fourth anniversary. That guy really amazed me, because he is one of a kind.

I've seen it all; starting from courtship, first days that turned into months, different gifts, gigs, their maturity and up until now. It all began in high school, and I have this idea that a romance formed in high school will fall down easily. But he proved me wrong. Moreover, there was something into them that other couples do not possess, and that is probably their secret formula.

I guess, he is also a good example on what is the physical manifestation of what love is all about. His love towards her is inexhaustible, persevering, selfless, and awe-inspiring. It almost appeared to me as an agape. He is a good model to those guys who are willing to give almost everything for the sake of the beloved.

I know that this is a late reaction for the Valentine's but it's better than nothing at all. Since I had no romantic affairs during that day, it's better to be a mere observer in this fast-paced world, because you do not need to be in the scene just to learn it.

In the long run, I wasn't able to understand what love really meant. Even if I have seen my idea of what it is about, I failed to define it. Is it really impossible for a man to uncover the oblivious meaning of love? Or are we looking too far and searching for arguments despite the fact that the answer is actually cognizable by simply observing it per se? The answers? I do not know. Perhaps, in time, we will know. And probably, in the end, where all the answers are. But who knows? A self-proclaimed god may descend from the clouds and teach us what the hell is it all about.